A child named Lorelie

It all started last year when I almost died. i was diagnosed with e.coli. A group of Doctors came rushing in the room and told me that i had to choose between myself and my unborn child. I was seven and a half months pregnant with my child i already had named, Lorelie. The decision for me was simple of course, "save the baby," I insisted. Bobby's face grew blank, and white without color. I knew that I would've died anyway and my baby wasn't infected with the virus, so my decision was easy. When I felt "my end" was drawing near, I felt relief. I closed my eyes and almost in a dream state, I felt like I shouldn't give up, it wasn't my time to go, not yet at least. I wanted so much just to walk out the door and say, "I feel better can I go home I miss my little boy." My fever had passed the hundred fifteen degree mark, and a Nurse came in and told me i had to sign some papers. Staring at the stack of papers she had paper clipped in a manila folder made me feel sick to my stomach. i knew what was in store for me, my last will and testament. I told the lady I didn't own anything, why would i need a will? She told me in a soft, apologetic voice, "It's for your Son Gabriel. What are your last wishes? Who is going to have custody of him?" At that moment the gravity of the situation hit me like a piano fell on top of me, and I was waiting to exhale. I didn't cry, but I wished that I could feel like there was still hope. Lying in bed after all the papers were signed, I was falling asleep and I heard in the back of my mind a little voice telling me not to give up. I got up off the bed with a million cords, and IVs attached to me, and I called out the door for a nurse. The Nurse came rushing in and asked what was wrong. I told her, "I cant give up i cant die like this." I realized at that moment that I was stronger than I ever had known. I couldn't give up on my Husband, someone I had searched, and longed for. I couldn't give up watching my little boy grow up. I took a shower, got dressed put on all the makeup i had in my little makeup pouch, brushed my hair, and walked around the Hospital's Maternity Ward until I felt like I couldn't walk anymore. The next day I woke up, and again was surrounded by a group of Doctors, they told me that my fever had reduced significantly and that i was well enough to drink antibiotics. "if they work Mrs. Carmona, you could go home tomorrow." I started crying, I thanked God for giving me another chance, for granting me the one wish I thought I would never have to ask. The next day my infection had dissipated, and I went home to my little family. I made myself a promise that day, I would never let anyone tell me what was right for me, what to wear, what to look like, to be normal or to follow the crowd. I was a new me, a better me, new and improved. On October 7th at 8:45 AM, my child named Lorelie was born. I kissed her on the forehead, and thanked her for showing me what love really is. Life is too short, live it as you please, because no one else can live it for you.